but at the same time I had the feeling that there was a lot of misunderstandings about tantra and that there were some deeper perspectives missing from the tantra I encountered in Europe. In 2013, I started looking for a school that could give me a traditional perspective on tantra and yoga to see if that could give me the answers I was looking for. In the search, I came across Shri Kali, and decided to leave my job as a communications officer to go there and see what it was about.

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Initially, I signed up for a three months course. I quickly realized that many things at Shri Kali were different from what I had seen before. At first this was a challenge to me, as I wanted to make sure that what I was learning was worth taking in. But at the same time, I came to get a different perspective so I decided to look into the teachings and give them a chance. I quickly realized how much sense they made to me and that the teachings had something very unique and beautiful to offer so I decided to prolong my stay to learn more.

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During my stay, I started to get a completely new way of looking at myself, other people and the world. For me, it is amazing how the practices and the study of the texts complement each other. It has been amazing to learn about the traditional texts and understandings of myself, other beings, and the universe from people that have this unique knowledge. To go deep into the philosophy but with a focus on integration has been an eye opener for me.

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One of the many things I appreciate is that the practice and philosophy encourages grounding and balance. It in no way encourages you to escape from this reality or the world and does not encourage you to isolate yourself. On the contrary, it is very much about living your life to the fullest but in this reality. Furthermore, I am like many other people often competitive, especially as I have been a competitive martial artist for many years. This competitiveness has often controlled me and taken over so I constantly had to be the best, comparing myself to others, and being dependent on recognition from someone else. I have been aware of this for many years and have worked on it a lot to let it go, as I saw that the feeling of being good enough would never be solid if it had to come from the outside. However, of all the things I have tried there was always something missing in this regard.

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Through this system, I have started to see life in a different way and realize things about myself that I have not seen before. For example, it is the first time, I have tried āsanas that are truly non-competitive and doing āsanas like this has been amazing. Combined with the study and the other practices we do, it has helped me to realize more and more who I truly am, and why I am here in this world. It is building an underlying strong foundation from where I can live my life to the fullest but with grounding and balance. For me that is what true freedom and happiness is about.